Wow, what can I say about India…I’m glad that I can say I’ve experienced it, I’m glad I survived it, I’m glad I can put it behind me.
I can’t decide how candid I should be in writing about my India experience. I don’t know who all reads this, and I don’t want to offend anyone…but I also want to be as real here as possible. I think that people like me build up places like India in our head…something that looks like these photos; colorful, exotic, ancient, exciting, mystical….there is a lot of expectation, and maybe those things exist somewhere here. But without fail, five minutes after leaving the hotel room I feel like I may turn into a crazy person. The begging, touting, hassling, photo taking, stares…are relentless. Almost everyone demands your attention and money, and are appalled when you don’t want to give it. It’s hard to enjoy being out anywhere because you feel like you can’t breathe (which is only compounded by the heat and the smell) with everyone grasping at you. It completely wears you down. Maybe we didn’t go to the right places…or maybe it’s because being a white female with curly blonde hair screams “walk all over me.” There were moments like this in Indonesia, but it’s so much more vicious and desperate and constant here. And it’s very hard for me to witness what is, in my opinion, a very backwards and misogynistic way of treating women. I know this can’t be what all of India is like, but it was more than enough for me. You know these kinds of places exist, you expect it walking into it, but being in the midst of it is something else. It’s too much. It’s not enjoyable. I hate to sound like a judgmental American, but contrasting and comparing is unavoidable. Religion and poverty are bad enough on their own, together they are just downright scary. I feel pretty lucky to have the life I have. Also, I loved the camels.
Tonight we take an overnight train to the Nepal boarder and I want to spend the week staring at the mountains.
